


Fading, faded

by ninthdreamie



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Marvel Cinematic Universe Fusion, Gen, Heavy Angst, M/M, i won’t tell who dies among the 8 of them so read, infinity war!au, takes place during the snap, thanos gets mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-18
Updated: 2019-04-18
Packaged: 2020-01-15 22:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18507925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninthdreamie/pseuds/ninthdreamie
Summary: 8 of the youngest Avengers undergo the snap. Not all of them live.





	Fading, faded

**Author's Note:**

> i wanted to hurt myself, so i wrote this and i’m sharing this with all of you :) avengers: endgame is near and i’m very excited! so i hope all the angst in this fic gives justice to the pain the movie gave (w thanos killing vision twice, peter fading and tony having to see it, and loki dying in the very beginning) us last year uwu

It’s too late.

 

It’s happening, right now.

 

Seeing the individuals he has been fighting with for so long turn into nothingness makes his heart ache unbearably. It’s because he cannot do anything about it, like time.

 

No matter what he does, he can’t stop the seconds ticking by. He can’t stop the hands of the clock. All he can do is watch them vanish.

 

But deep down, he hopes that his _family_ —yes, Mark, Jeno, Donghyuck, Jaemin, Chenle, and Jisung—is able to stay after...whatever he can call this. He hopes that despite all of them being separated, they will meet together again after all this.

 

He feels a hand grabbing his arm in a hurry, and he gets dragged to who knows where. Renjun cannot seem to grasp reality just yet.

 

“Renjun, wake up.” He hears Jaehyun tell him, but he lets the words pass in and out of his ears.

 

It may be his anxiety talking, but there is something wrong. He must have lost one of them somewhere. He wishes he wasn’t overthinking so much.

 

“They’re gone. _They’re gone_.” Jaehyun seems to be talking to him. The two words are making him want to retreat into the safe spaces of his mind even more. “I managed to contact Lucas before he—,”

 

The mention of his name pulls him back to what is happening right, finally feeling his feet on the ground, trying to catch up with Jaehyun. “What happened to Lucas?”

 

Saying his other name irks Renjun now, for it makes him feel like he is treating him as another comrade or fellow hero. Yukhei is much, much _more_ than that now.

 

Renjun is afraid that if he loses him, everything will—

 

“We lost him.”

 

Everything will not be the same anymore.

 

“What?”

 

They stop running. Renjun sets himself free from Jaehyun’s grip, trying to stand straight. He eventually fails, falling on his butt as his legs begin to tremble. The latter just looks at him pitifully, the corners of his mouth curled downwards and his shining eyes fighting back tears.

 

Jaehyun will think I won’t feel anything, Renjun realizes. His face is still monotonous, not willing to show any emotion. He has been trained his entire life that showing his feelings is a sign of weakness.

 

“Mark, Donghyuck, and Yukhei. We lost them.”

 

Renjun clenches his teeth, tries to crush the leaves under the palms of his hands. He breathes in and out, making the oxygen reach his brain, praying he will finally think straight. He blinks his eyes rapidly, looking around, seeing that so many people are still _fading_.

 

Mark and Donghyuck faded.

 

Yukhei faded.

 

Yukhei.

 

After years and years of holding everything in, a single tear slips from his left eye. His lips shake, but he does not let out a heart wrenching sob or wail that can attract trouble. Renjun just stays on the ground dumbly, feeling everything inside him disintegrate.

 

“No.” It’s what Renjun can only utter as more tears begin to fall.

 

Jaehyun cries then and there too, putting a hand over his mouth. He lets his weapon fall to the ground, but he does not get down on his knees.

 

The pain, and the longing, it’s shared. Renjun is still denying everything he just heard, refusing to believe it unless he is given solid evidence that they are gone.

 

But maybe it is them not contacting him, that is a sign in itself. Heck, he doesn’t even know if Jeno, Jaemin, Chenle, and Jisung are still alive. He hopes they still are. He can’t take any more losses.

 

Renjun suffers silently, clutching onto one of Yukhei’s gloves—something he gave him before they parted. _“My glove will be with you.”_ The latter even joked at that time, trying to ease the already heavy atmosphere back then.

 

His glove is here, yes. Its owner no longer exists, and it will probably stay that way forever.

 

For the first time in his life, Renjun _grieves_.

 

*

 

Jaemin is in a frenzy.

 

He does all that he can, even to the point of overusing his reality-warping ability, hoping that it can at least delay the speed of everyone else fading.

 

He also throws beams of energy at the sky, thinking that it is probably some other life force making everyone around him disappear.

 

He does everything to the point of exhaustion. It’s surprising how he is still standing up, breathing heavily from the amount of energy he wasted. No one can blame him for being paranoid, as he turns to Jeno with shaky eyes.

 

Jeno is still standing, looking down at a piece of Thanos’ armor, an indication that they fought him in his homeworld. The rest are gone, and it’s just the two of them now.

 

Jaemin begins to cry from the helplessness he is feeling, wanting to do something to bring them back. If his abilities were greater, he _could_ do it. He can even bring back the rest who have faded in Wakanda too, if there ever are.

 

He only has Jeno now, and honestly, just a person surviving with him is already a blessing in itself.

 

He wipes his tears and walks over to Jeno properly, trying to think of ways to meet with the rest.

 

Until he sees the tip of his finger becoming ash, slowly.

 

Jaemin’s eyes widened in horror at the sight. “Jeno, your hand.”

 

All Jeno does is look at him, as if there is nothing wrong going on, like he has seen this coming. He smiles at him instead, covering his already disintegrating hand. “Jaem, it’s okay.”

 

“ _No_ , it’s not.” Jaemin thinks that hiding in somewhere dark can save most of Jeno, that being exposed less to the outside world is an effective solution. So he grabs his hand and starts running to somewhere near, and pitch black.

 

It’s going to work, Jaemin expects. It _should_ work.

 

However, as they keep running, the ash from behind them multiplies rapidly. Jeno is about to lose his legs. Jaemin does not want to cry; he isn’t going let his emotions take over and bring them down even further. Having no choice, he carries the former in his arms, just as the lower half of his legs disappear.

 

“Don’t let it get to you Jen, we—,”

 

“I’ve seen this coming.”

 

Jaemin does not stop, but he turns to Jeno, who is still smiling. He just looks sadder now, resting the side of his head on his shoulder. “I knew I was going to die.”

 

“ _Shut up_ , you’re not dying on me.” Jaemin assures him, and himself, with a shaky voice. He manages to find a gigantic pile of rocks along the way, and he slips inside it.

 

They’re surrounded with darkness now. This should work.

 

He puts Jeno down gently, and makes him rest his back against a corner. An upper body is all he has now.

 

Jaemin opens both of his palms, directed at the small path they got inside with, turning the rocks into crumbs with the beams of energy. There are tiny gaps between them, making light still come in.

 

“Your mind is so loud. I’ll be fading into nothing, deal with it.”

 

“There must be a way!”

 

Jeno manages to send a message to his stubborn brain.

 

 _Just be with me, please_.

 

Jaemin does not have the heart to say no to whatever he requests, especially now. So he stops from fully exhausting himself, quickly approaching Jeno.

 

As soon as he is close, Jeno cups his cheeks. He is already crying. Jaemin doesn’t know what to do, as always.

 

Through the years, Jeno always seemed to provide the answers to the many questions Jaemin’s brain contains. If the latter was the heart, then he was the brain between the two of them, always logical and reasonable.

 

It is why losing him feels like having a final taste of sanity before he loses his mind. At this point, Jaemin wishes his heart and his abilities will be enough for some deity above them to keep Jeno intact.

 

“Please don’t go.” Jaemin begs, placing his palms against the back of his hands. “The world needs you.”

 

 _I need you_ , Jaemin thinks. Jeno hears it, understands, and slowly shakes his head.

 

He sighs. “I think I’ve done my part.” Jeno says, accepting his fate then and there. “It’s your turn now.”

 

Jaemin shakes his head aggressively, his pained whimpers filling the silence. He is still in denial, that all of this is probably another case of his nightmares, that this isn’t real.

 

“I’m not getting out of here without you.”

 

Jeno’s arms are already turning into ashes, but he still manages to leave a kiss on his lips. Jaemin cries harder at the action, proceeding to embrace whatever is left of him.

 

“The world needs a heart, when all else fails.” Jeno whispers, and the pain of being torn apart is heard in his weakening voice. “And you’re that heart. So you have to stay, okay?”

 

Jaemin wants to say no, that he is going to destruct himself to be with him, because they did promise in the very beginning that no one leaves the other behind.

 

But maybe some promises _should_ be broken.

 

Most of Jeno is already gone, and his last words for Jaemin are this: “I love you.” With that, he is out of sight in the latter’s eyes. What remains is ash, and his necklace.

 

Filled with so much pain, anger, and hopelessness, Jaemin unleashes the peak of his power. An explosion makes the pile of rocks he is hiding in crumble, and it makes a quarter of Titan look more wretched than it is.

 

Jaemin continues screaming, punching the sandy ground with one hand and holding onto Jeno’s necklace with the other. With the way his powers are becoming more destructible, he can turn everything solid in the planet he is in into crumbs.

 

But he chooses not to. After all, he must have remained for he had a greater purpose. Maybe Jeno is right.

 

When he gets exposed to light again, Jaemin falls to his side, too tired to move.

 

*

 

“Jisung, I see them.”

 

Chenle’s cold hands tremble even further, as he sees the faces of the rest of his friends through Donghyuck’s self-made advanced computer. Their names are highlighted in the color red.

 

Lucas Wong. Mark Lee. Lee Jeno. Lee Donghyuck.

 

Jisung quickly gets up from the couch, standing next to Chenle to see the status of the rest. The four faces that show up to them, their carefree smiles—it haunts them.

 

They can’t be tracked anymore.

 

“Thanos wiped them out too.” Jisung concludes, turning to Chenle, who is still taken aback.

 

A few seconds later, the computer shows them who are still alive. Among them is Renjun and Jaemin, who are in Wakanda and Titan, respectively.

 

Chenle bites his lower lip, turning to his spearbow on the floor, and Jisung’s Spiderman suit right next to it.

 

“It’s just us now. You, me, Renjun hyung, and Jaemin hyung...among the eight of us.” Jisung holds in his tears before they can fall, stomping towards their things, grabbing his suit.

 

The other turns his eyes back to the computer, seeing that Taeyong, Taeil, Yuta, Kun, Jaehyun, and Sicheng are still alive. Along with their names are two other potential recruits for the team from Earth, still unknown.

 

“We have to help them get back here, and devise a new plan.” Jisung adds, glancing at another notification from the computer.

 

There is another potential recruit. However, they’re not from Earth.

 

Chenle doesn’t pay attention to it, navigating through the computer, finding an option for him to contact the ones still alive.

**Author's Note:**

> i posted this too in twitter but if u wanna yell at me about it, here:
> 
> twt: ninthdreamie  
> cc: binominal
> 
> pls drop a comment!!! validate me!!! thanks


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